Friday, June 20, 2014

Instafriday

i'm actually posting a friday thing on friday?! say what?? it's like a christmas miracle. 

linking up with jeanette to show our crazy kids in our crazy week with our phone photos. 

life rearranged

being a fire fighter family means striping away the traditional definition of the holidays. we do easter on monday some times, we've spent every thanksgiving since laine was 18 months old at the fire station. this year we visited daddy at the station for father's day. we love him and wanted to be with him and if that meant going to work and getting to climb on cool fire trucks and eating ice cream  before dinner than i guess we'll take one for the team. 
still hard to believe we have four kids. please 
note cora is fully accessorized and hazel looks like a crazy ragamuffin.


this guy is my everything. i'm so grateful for him and he's been my rock these last crazy pregnancy and baby filled years. 

stamping. thought it'd be a good distraction while i made dinner. 
it was. just not the way i was hoping. {sigh.}


we did our first thing on our summer fun list. pjs and ice cream.

the rest is just everyday fun. playing. waiting. watching. building. crashing or "booming." 
living and growing. 



{these two. ah!!! i die. they are only 20 days apart and they kill me with their cuteness!}

these kids. i tell ya, they make me insane, but they are a part of me. and i love them deeply.

i was praying last night that i would see them through Christ's eyes. i struggle with the job, i've made no qualms about that, and i think there is nothing wrong with saying this job is hard and feeling the burden of it.  my husband is gone all the time. he is a wonderful provider, but none the less the job requires his absence for a minimum of 24 hours at a time. thus i must stand alone and pull the slack. i chose this life as well and though it was modeled to me i never understood the depth of sacrifice my mother or her mother before her faced. i don't know if my particular struggle is one that other people face, i assume it is. my anger boils over, my stress levels rise to new heights, and i am completely overwhelmed some days. okay everyday at least once. especially when i am alone.

 knowing my husband is going to be gone for four days is like watching a tornado head your way and not having a storm shelter to run into. i know it's gonna be chaos and some moments pretty scary, but this time around i'm reaching out and spending time with others. keeping the kids busy and playing with friends. i have faith and hope in the knowledge that my feet will not fail in the swirly storm. 

4 comments:

  1. Personally I think it is healthy to say you struggle with motherhood. I certainly do. I also pray on a regular basis that God would show me my kids through his eyes because my eyes are often clouded by the constant fighting, the whining, and endless days. Keep up the good work!

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    1. The fighting and whining are my nemesis! Thank you for the words of encouragement! It gets crazy most days, but it's nice to know we aren't alone in this motherhood journey.

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  2. i know my baby is new, and i only have one, but i remember being TERRIFIED when my hubby went back to work after our baby was born. he's a firefighter too (we celebrated father's day on saturday), but thank goodness they're only on shift 24hrs at a time here. gone for 24, home for 24. i don't know how you do it with him being gone for 4! you're amazing!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Jenny! It's not normally that many, but with SOD (overtime) being plentiful during the summer months we choose to sacrifice and he will work many in a row. Congrats on the baby!

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